Jack Todd: Atlantic Division will be a tough hurdle to climb for the Canadiens

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Around 10:30 Saturday night (give or take a penalty shot) the Ottawa Senators made it official:

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The Canadiens are a last-place team.

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That’s last in the Atlantic Division, mind you, but that’s the problem. The division is tougher than blocking an Arber Xhekaj slapshot with your shins — and getting tougher. The Bruins, Panthers and Leafs (unfortunately) are legit Stanley Cup contenders. The improving Red Wings should make the playoffs.

Buffalo and Ottawa were supposed to contend for a playoff spot, but the Sabres underachieved as usual and the Sens spent half of the season stumbling around like a drunk looking for his keys. The Sens have been coming on, however, and when Tim Stutzle scored the only goal of the shootout against the Vegas Golden Knights, Ottawa moved a point ahead of the skidding Canadiens and into seventh place in the division.

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Not only are the Senators now ahead of their rivals along the 417, they also hold three games in hand. (Even Columbus has closed to within four points of the Habs and the Coyotes are only a point back and both teams have games in hand, so a bottom five finish is a real possibility, but over the long term, the division is the real concern.)

Not only are the Canadiens the worst team in the division right now, they have the worst record against the division at 4-10-2. They have a winning record against the Metropolitan Division, but it’s within the Atlantic that they have really struggled — and only the aging Tampa Bay Lightning appear likely to get worse in the near future.

Kent Hughes, in other words, has his work cut out for him, both now as we head to the trade deadline and during the off-season. He’s the man for the job — but don’t underestimate the size of the task in the stormy Atlantic.

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Holy leaping mayors, Batman! The empty-net goal for Montreal had Mayor Valérie Plante jumping up and down in the stands at Verdun Auditorium.

The crowd was going berserk, the sheer joy the players felt was infectious. It was a 6-3 win for Montreal over Ottawa and if the final score had as much to do with Ottawa’s goaltending as with Montreal’s offence, it was still a memorable game.

If there has been one mild concern early in this inaugural season for the PWHL, it has been the lack of scoring across the league, including in Montreal where the power play has struggled despite the presence of Marie-Philip Poulin.

But with Claire Dalton’s hat trick to lead the way, Montreal scored more than enough goals to trounce Ottawa and take sole possession of first in the league, three points up on Minnesota. It was enough to make Ms. Mayor hit a 40-inch vertical.

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Holy roller: It didn’t take Matias Coccaro long to prove that he’s more than just a bad moustache.

The Uruguayan striker, signed from Argentina by CF Montréal on Jan. 31, is a cross between Cristiano Ronaldo and Neymar Jr. — he whines like Ronaldo and dives like Neymar.

During an enervating 0-0 tie at Orlando City Saturday evening, Coccaro was guilty of four solid dives in the first half alone.

The worst of it came in the 31st minute when Orlando’s Wilder Cartagena rolled into Coccaro’s leg from behind. It was enough to knock the Uruguayan off his feet — but not enough to justify the agony roll that followed. Coccaro carried on so long that I thought maybe he was injured. Then he got up, put on an exaggerated limp for a few steps, and started running as though nothing had happened.

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We hear the Brazilian judge scored it a perfect 10.0.

Hanging Chad: Is the CFL really going to leave this whole Chad Kelly situation hanging? Nothing beyond a statement saying in effect there would be no statement? No promise of an investigation?

Does Kelly himself think no one is going to notice his regrettable past?

The Argos former strength coach is suing the CFL club for wrongful dismissal and Kelly for alleged violations of the Ontario Human Rights Code. The complainant alleges that when she refused Kelly’s overtures, the situation deteriorated into a series of incidents in which he used threatening language, the Argos failed to act when informed and she was told Jan. 29 that her contract was not being renewed.

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The allegations have not been tested in court. But it’s 2024, not 1964. Kelly, who was last seen throwing six picks in the division final against the Alouettes, came to Canada as a waving red flag after on- and off-field problems trailed him from Clemson to the Denver Broncos. Transparency is the bare minimum.

You can’t hide on this one, Randy Ambrosie.

Heroes: Nick Suzuki, Arber Xhekaj, Cole Caufield, Tereza Vanisova, Ann-Sophie Bettez, Maureen Murphy, Marie-Philip Poulin, Hallie Clarke, Caitlin Clark, Sorana Cirstea, Jean-Guy Talbot, Christopher Morales Williams &&&& last but not least, Claire Dalton.

Zeros: Chad Kelly, Randy Ambrosie, John Murphy, the Argonauts, the CFL, Matias Coccaro, Soccer Canada, court storming, Cristiano Ronaldo, the whining Lakers, MLB’s PantsGate, Claude Brochu, David Samson &&&& last but not least, Jeffrey Loria.

Now and forever.

jacktodd46@yahoo.com

twitter.com/jacktodd46

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