Sask. woman discovers peace in deep water after leaving painful front lines behind | CBC News
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Alanna MacIntyre had almost given up.
After nearly seven years working on the front lines as a primary care paramedic in Saskatchewan, the stress was taking its toll on her — mentally and physically.
In 2019, she suffered a bad fall and had to take a leave from work. She had to undergo multiple surgeries on her knee.
MacIntyre was in excruciating pain while also struggling with depression and anxiety. She had lost trust in her own body and she was scared she couldn’t move like she used to because she had been hurt so badly.
She decided to confront those fears in a swimming pool. That’s when the 30-year-old realized she could cope with her pain in the water.
“I could move without fear again, which was so healing,” MacIntyre said. “It was super good for my knee too, but it was good for my spirit.”
That revelation, of how being in the water helped, led her to scuba diving. As soon as she descended into the water, she felt a sense of peace.
“When I put my gear on and I get in the water, [the] world gets really small. It is healing.”
The cold and murky depths of Saskatchewan’s lakes and rivers are like a tranquil, quiet world.
Not long after discovering what MacIntyre describes as her “bubble therapy,” she left her career as a paramedic behind for good.
George Mueller has seen how diving has the power to change people and offer them clarity. He is the owner and staff instructor at the Diving Centre in Saskatoon.
“Every time you put your head in the water, there’s something beautiful and new,” he said.
Mueller mentored MacIntyre as she learned how to dive and then he hired her to work at the centre. For the last three years, she’s been working as a Divemaster and Hydrostatic Requalifier — arranging diving trips and testing equipment.
At the centre, Mueller said they work with people who have been through “hell” — people who have been in accidents or people who work stressful careers like paramedics, but also doctors, lawyers and other emergency workers.
Mueller said diving helps them clear their heads and focus on the present moment.
“We just try to help them through,” he said. “It’s very rewarding to see all of that come around.”
Even though MacIntyre was no longer happy working as a paramedic, she said it did bring her some self-worth, because she knew she was helping others.
Still, she felt so low, she wasn’t sure she’d survive if she stayed in the profession.
She credits scuba diving for “saving her life.”
Kindred spirits
Tim May knows how difficult it can be on the front lines of crisis. He’s an advanced care paramedic who works with Parkland Ambulance in Prince Albert, Sask. He also trained MacIntyre in her early days with Emergency Medical Services (EMS.)
May says the stress of working in EMS is unique. They face a lot of verbal abuse while trying to help people and often have to respond to calls that aren’t actually an emergency. For example, May said some people use the ambulance as a taxi.
Then they respond to big calls involving human tragedy and suffering. Those are the ones that eat away at their psyche, May said.
“There’s no light at the end of the tunnel some days,” he explains.
At one point, May and MacIntyre were partners in EMS and worked together on night shifts.
“I’ve been on some of her worst calls.” May said. “I know a little bit of what she is healing from.”
May is also a diver. MacIntyre says it was the late night conversations with him that planted the seed in her mind about cold water diving.
He said he sees MacIntyre as his kindred spirit. Now, instead of working together in an ambulance — they dive together.
“I like what I do. I like being here. I like being alive,” MacIntyre said. “It’s strange, and it’s definitely never where I saw myself [ending up,] but I am so glad that this is what I got.”
MacIntyre’s former roommate, Taylor Everett, said she’s proud to see how much MacIntyre has overcome.
“She is the most genuine kind hearted person,” Everett said. “She teaches perseverance. She teaches finding strength, even when you feel you don’t have any. It’s amazing to watch.”
MacIntyre has joined a team that helps the RCMP recover debris from underwater accident scenes.
Her next goal is to become a diving instructor to help train the next generation of divers. She also wants to use her position in the shop as a queer woman to encourage inclusivity.
“She’s going to change the world, and I think she is already doing it, one dive at a time,” Taylor said of her friend.
MacIntyre has been able to find peace in her life. Now she wants to help others find their peace, or at the very least inspire them to take a risk and try something that might seem out of their realm.
“Finding the thing, the right work, everything, can be so radically life-changing.”
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